VA’s: Shine in an interview with 3 top listening skills

Recently I posted the article “The Top Three Listening Mistakes VA’s Make in an Interview,” where I discussed what not to do in an interview. Now, I’ll describe three different listening skills that you do want to employ in an interview. 

Before I begin, please bear in mind that these skills take a bit of practice to use effortlessly, so be patient with yourself if you don’t master them right away. 

If you want to become an “Ace” listener overnight, consider signing up for my upcoming workshop in January to kick-start your 2010:  “Shine in the Interview: How to present yourself like a Superstar and Get the Client.”   

We’ll be going into listening skills, and many other interview skills in more depth at this comprehensive tele-workshop, and you’ll get plenty of coaching and practice in perfecting what you learn. Here’s the link for more details: http://bit.ly/6fmgXo .

 Okay, let’s cut to the chase. Here are the top 3 listening skills:

Skill #1: Acknowledging

 Other terms for this are “mirroring” or “reflecting.” To acknowledge, listen very carefully to what the prospect is saying, and when you feel as though you understand the essence of what they are telling you, repeat it back to them. Not word for word, but in your own words.

 An easy way to begin is “let me make sure I understand you correctly,” and an easy way to end is to ask “is that right?” This gives them the opportunity to correct you if you didn’t get it quite right, or to say “Yes! That’s exactly right!”

 Using your own words is key, because that’s what tells them you really heard what they wanted you to get. In addition, sometimes they have new insights about themselves just by listening to your reflection of what you heard! You might get a client based on that alone. Who wouldn’t want a VA who can do that??

Skill #2 Validating

 Another way to say this is “Validating feelings.” This is tricky, because I don’t want you to think I’m suggesting you be very “touchy-feely” in the interview. On the other hand, it’s a fundamental truth that when you validate how someone is feeling, they feel as though you really “get them.” They feel relief. Someone understands.

 For example: Let’s say you are speaking with a prospect who is overwhelmed and frustrated with too much to do and not enough time to do it all in (of course, that never happens with coaches, right? lol). You can hear it in her voice, in the things she says, and in how she (or he) says them.

 All you need to do to validate her is to say: “I can certainly understand why you would feel overwhelmed and frustrated. Anyone in your situation would feel that way.”

 You can personalize how you say it and add details depending on the situation, but the basic core message you want to get across is: You hear her pain, you empathize with it, and she has every right to feel that way.

Skill #3: Open ended questions

 In an interview, and even with established clients you often need to ask questions that will get the prospect/client to tell you what they need. The best way to do that is by asking questions which can’t be answered “yes” or “no”, and which encourage them to give you information.

 Here are some examples:

•  “What would your ideal day look like if you were only doing what you loved in your business?”
•  “How would you grow your business if you didn’t have to spend time on repetitive work?”
•  “Where are you spending time in your business on things you know you should delegate?”

 The key is the very first word in the question. Here are some other open ended question starters: why, who, when, if, and tell me about . . .

 It’s a good idea to have a list of open-ended questions you’ve created ahead of time handy, although be careful to only use them if they are appropriate in the situation. Otherwise it becomes obvious it’s a “canned” question and you risk not sounding sincere.

 I recommend you practice these skills with your friends and family first. Once you get the hang of it, they will come easier to you and flow more smoothly and naturally in your interviews.

 And if you’re ready to “Go for the Gold” and become overnight experts in closing clients in an interview, be sure and check out my Kick Start 2010 Interview Workshop:  http://bit.ly/6fmgXo .